You’re Screwed! – 9 Unusual Ways to Open a Wine Bottle Without a Corkscrew

It takes the average person less than ten seconds to open a wine bottle with a corkscrew.

But what if you find yourself stranded on a desert island (or worse, someone’s house who doesn’t drink) with a bottle of your favorite Burgundy? Is there hope? Can you open wine without a corkscrew, or needlessly suffer in silence (and sobriety)?

Fear not. Below are 9 unusual – but extremely effective – ways how to open wine without a corkscrew…

Top 9 Ways – How to Open Wine Without A Corkscrew

#1 – The Tree Method

Wrap a towel around the base of the bottle. Then firmly hit the base of the bottle against a tree, wall or any other flat, hard surface. Each hit pushes the wine against the cork, and eventually pushes the cork out.

#2 – Dropkick Burgundies

This method of opening wine without a real corkscrew may seem a little wild, but it can work as long as you don’t drop the wine bottle! Place the wine bottle upside down and hold it between your knees. Repeatedly strike the base with your shoe until the cork is roughly halfway out. Then remove the cork by hand. This method works with sparkling wines, too; just be sure to let it sit at least ten minutes before fully removing the cork, or be prepared to get a wine bath in the process!

“MacGyver Method” Using pliers to open without a corkscrew. – Image credit fanpop

#3 – The MacGyver Method

Got a toolbox? Great. Grab a pair of pliers and a screw. The screw should be a least 4 inches long and the greater the distance between screw threads, the better (provides more grip in the cork).

Step 1: Place the screw into the cork until it’s roughly half an inch sticking out. Be careful not to go too deep to where it goes all the way through the cork and taints the wine.

Step: Gently use the pliers to pull out the screw. Alternatively, use the back end of a hammer to pull the screw out. Voila you now have open wine without a corkscrew!

#4 – The Archimedes Effect

The ancient Greek philosopher Archimedes once boasted “Give me a place to stand and a lever long enough, and I will move the world.”

Our aspirations aren’t quite as ambitious. But the concept of fulcrums still applies. For this method, take a small paring knife or pocket knife (Swiss Army knives work too, but then, they usually have corkscrews. You don’t have a Swiss Army knife around, do you?).

Gently work the knife around the edge of the cork. Don’t push down too hard; you’re trying to slide the blade around the cork, not through it. Once the blade is past the cork, begin working the blade back and forth. This will loosen the cork, allowing you to pull it out by hand.

Mommie Dearest

Mommie Dearest – Coat hanger method how to open wine without a corkscrew – Image credit Daily Musto

#5 – The Mommie Dearest Method

If you’ve seen “Mommie Dearest” you’ll get the reference. If not, watch the movie. It’s worth it.

For this method of how to open a wine bottle without a corkscrew you’ll need a wire hanger. Bend the tip of the hanger back about 30 degrees so it looks like a fish hook. Then slide the wire down alongside the cork, and rotate it roughly 90 degrees so the hook sinks into the cork’s bottom. Then pull the wire up.  You can use pliers or by hand (but use a towel or gloves to protect yourself).

#6 – The Knot’s Landing Method

Remember the Dropkick Burgundy method? Well, if your shoes have laces, here’s another way to get a wine bottle open without a  bottle opener: tie a knot at the end of your lace and push it down the side of the cork. Then oh-so-gently pull the lace – and the cork – out. If the lace keeps popping out, tie a larger knot and try again.

Corn holders are a great way to open wine without a corkscrew

Corn holders are a great way to open wine without a corkscrew

#7 – The Cork on the Snob Method

You know those small handles you place into corn on the cob? They make great corkscrews, too. Place the corn cob holder into the cork and gently pull upward while twisting back and forth.





#8 – The Hammer Time Method

Hammer five nails into the cork. Pull them out with the hammer. Pretty fool proof way of how to open a wine bottle without a corkscrew, huh?

And now for a special bonus method:

#9 – The Napoleon Dynamite

Also known as le sabrage, this method lets you remove Champagne corks (or any other sparkling wine) with a sword. Seriously, how cool is that?

The custom began with Napoleon’s troops and is still considered an effective – not to mention entertaining- method for removing corks.

How to open wine with a knife / sword / sabre:

Step 1: Chill the wine overnight in the refrigerator. If you haven’t, try soaking the bottleneck in ice water beforehand.
Step 2:  Remove the foil and wire cage from atop the cork.
Step 3: Wipe down the bottle to remove all excess moisture.
Step 4:  Find the seams on the bottle. This is where the two bottle halves join together.
Step 5: Tilt the bottle to a 45 degree angle. Safely point it away from others (but you already knew that, didn’t you?).
Step 6: Place the blunt edge of the sword on base of the bottle. Slide the sword along the seam towards the cork in one fluid motion. If done correctly, the sword will “behead” the bottle, taking the bottle top and cork clean off. Plus, it makes you look really, really cool. If not, you will have a lot of wine and glass flying everywhere, so safety goggles would be prudent. Dare we suggest, leaving this one to the experts?

Video credit: How to Sabre Champagne:

If all else fails…

Then you may just have to breakdown and buy a proper corkscrew or get yourself a fancy box-o-wine.

3 Valentines Day Gift Ideas for Him and Her

It’s that one day a year where you’ve got to show your significant other exactly how much they mean to you with a gift that not only says, “I love you,” but one that says, “I understand you.” If you’re reading this, then it’s safe to assume your guy or girl likes to drink and have fun. Whether it be wine, liquor, or beer, we’ve got a few ideas that could help you say what you need to say, but without spending a lot of dough.

Gifts for Her

1. Giant Extra Large Wine Glass

It’s so big, there’s three words that say how big it really is: Giant, Extra, Large. This handblown mega-glass is so massive it holds an entire 750mL bottle of wine. Do yourself a favor and get a few, so not only could she share a pleasantly wined evening with you, but she could also have an amazing night in with the girls.

2. Parisian Chic High Heel Wine Holder

What is the number one thing girls love the most? If you guessed purse-size animals or jewelry, you’re on the right track, but oh so wrong. Shoes are a girl’s real best friend, and this glitzy high heel wine bottle holder is the perfect mixture of “chic” and “cute” that fits wine bottles of all sizes.

3. Leopard Flip Flop Bottle Opener

In the realm of all things “cute,” a flip flop bottle opener takes the cake. But this isn’t just any slick bottle opener, it’s got that leopard print extra that girls love to wear. Does your girl not like the leopard? Don’t worry, we’ve got it in pink and zebra striped too.

Gifts for Him

1. Simply Class Whiskey Glass Set

Men love feeling like the elite wise-guys of Madison Avenue, and those elite wise-guys drink whiskey. Set your man up with a set of hand blown crystal whiskey glasses. These hold 14 ounces of awesome in a four-inch rim. These beautiful glasses will take you back to a simpler time where having class was respected and the finer things in life were gained through honest, hard work.

2. Personalized Saloon Man Cave Sign

Give your man the expressed right of claiming his territory, without making the mess that your pets do. This 18″x14″ saloon savvy sign, made with real wood, can be personalized with your guy’s name so that all his friends will know they’re entering his domain. What happens in the man cave, stays in the man cave.

3. Vintage Dude Beer Mugs & Flasks

Made from durable, lightweight plastic, with a classy description authorizing your man’s right to just sit, relax, and enjoy his brew. These mega-mugs are perfect for barbecues or hanging out for the big game. We’ve also got decade-personalized tankards available for ages 30, 40, and 50, as well as flasks for 30 and 40.

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