TVs Best Loved Drunks

There’s nothing quite like getting home after a long day at work, kicking your shoes off, procuring a hearty serving of your alcoholic beverage of choice, and sitting down on the couch for a few relaxing hours of television entertainment. The benefits, such as comfortable furniture and private restrooms, are hard to argue. Even though the television waves are packed with plenty of likable characters that are perfectly suitable to spend an evening with, everyone needs a good drinking buddy. Drunk characters have had a home on television since the dawn of broadcasting, and every year, a few new drunk people move into TV land. From classic TV, to 90s TV sitcoms, to drunk cartoon characters, we wanted to pay tribute to 12 of TVs best loved drunks. Tell us about the drinking buddies on your favorite television shows in the comments below.

Randy Marsh from South Park

One of the most prominent citizens of South Park, CO is Stan’s dad, Randy Marsh. A geologist, discount store employee, and mall security guard by trade, he’s also one of the best drunk cartoon characters on TV. Whether he’s performing music, setting world records, or protecting fellow citizens from angry shoppers, Randy does it with panache, and usually a little vino. Here’s a great clip of Mr. Mash hosting his own simultaneous beer and wine tasting, which sounds totally awesome.

Lucy from I Love Lucy

I Love Lucy - Funny TV Characters

© CBS Worldwide

So many times I’ve wanted to adopt a cat and name her “Lucy,” just so when she got into trouble I could say, “Luuuuuccccyyyy!” Although Lucy Ricardo, from the classic TV series I Love Lucy, was by no means a lush, it was pretty hilarious when she got inadvertently drunk while she and Ethel were executing their shenanigans for the week. The best example is the classic episode where Lucy gets booked for a TV commercial selling Vitameatavegamin. This fictional health drink, and predecessor to The Master Cleanse, was purported to contain, “”vitamins, meat, vegetables, and minerals,” but also a healthy dose of alcohol. Over continued re-takes, as Lucy swallows shot after shot of what I can only imagine would be something like a savory 50 proof schnapps, and gets hilariously intoxicated in an innocent manner that only old television shows can get away with.

Tom & Donna from Parks and Recreation

Tom and Donna

© Comcast/NBC

Clothes. #treatyoself Fragrances. #treatyoself Massages. #treatyoself Mimosas. #treatyoself. Tom Haverford and Donna Mingle from the sitcom Parks and Recreation, are two drunk and incredibly funny TV characters. These Pawnee, IN citizens, played by Aziz Ansari and Retta, respectively, have become synonymous with living life to the fullest. Their self-created holiday, Treat Yo’ Self Day, is dedicated to indulging with absolute selfishness in everything from luxury accessories to fine cocktails. Their love of nightlife also makes them two of the drunk characters I’d most want to take with me on a Vegas weekend. With only a few episodes of Parks & Rec left before the series finale, it’s time to mix up a drink and treat yo’ self to a night of Tom & Donna binge watching.

Detective Rustin “Rust” Cohle from True Detective

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© HBO

Who hasn’t thought about how fun it would be to get drunk with Matthew McConaughey? If you haven’t, please take a moment and do so right now. Seems fun, right? However, getting drunk with his cable TV persona from the series True Detective might be a little more intense. As he takes swig of Lone Star Beer, or dips into his well-worn leather flask, the character of Rustin Spencer “Rust” Cohle is a force to be reckoned with. As his alcohol consumption increases, so does his intensity. Even though we love watching Rust get drunk on our flatscreens, we’d pass on meeting him for drinks at the local bar. We’d rather not get trapped in a bar stool conversation about The Conspiracy Against the Human Race.

Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

The patriarch of Springfied’s favorite family, Homer Simpson is another drunk cartoon character that cannot be forgotten. Homer’s love of beer is second only to his dedication and love for his family. Whether he’s headed down to Moe’s Tavern for a cold one, or stopping by the Kwik-E-Mart for a six pack of Duff on the way home from the nuclear power plant, Homer rarely goes an episode without imbibing. And who can forget that loving musical tribute, “It Was a Very Good Beer.” When drunk people, like Homer, sing an ode to booze like this, you just want to reach through the screen and give them a well deserved, “cheers!”

Norm Peterson from Cheers

Norm From Cheers

© CBS TV

If you don’t have a bar where everybody knows your name, you might want to go watch an episode of Cheers. This classic TV series only had one customer that appeared in every single episode, and that was Norm Peterson. Norm was exactly the kind of guy you want to pull up next to at a bar. Friendly, honest, and always with an open tab. Played to perfection by George Wendt, Norm was loyal to his favorite bar, his favorite restaurant, and his favorite people, even his ex-wife, Vera. So the next time you’d like to get away, start up an old episode of cheer, and have a beer for Norm, and put it on his tab.

drunk-tv-characters-love-cocktails

Chelsea Handler

Chelsea Handler

© Chelsea Handler

Although Chelsea Handler isn’t fictional, she’s definitely a drunk television character. Even after watching just one or two episodes of Chelsea Lately, you learn that her favorite alcohol is vodka, and her favorite thing in the world to do is drink it. Whether you actually believe that she drinks as much as she claims, you have to admit that a life filled with that much boozing sounds like an awful lot of fun. Her tastes have changed over the years, from Ketel One to Grey Goose, for example, but she stays true to vodka through thick and thin. Although we’ll have to wait until 2016 to see more Chelsea on a weekly basis, there’s no doubt that there will still be vodka in her glass when she returns to the air, ahem, cyber waves.

Don Draper from Mad Men

Don Draper

© AMCTV

Mad Men ushered a number of things back into the cultural spotlight, but arguably the biggest was whiskey. Now, whiskey never went anywhere, and it was always a staple of liquor cabinets from coast to coast, but its cultural influence has definitely taken a surge since Don Draper first walked onto our TV screens. Some would say that Don, played by Jon Hamm, is hardly loveable, but you have to have some respect for a broken man who (mostly) keeps himself together in a fractured world. The world of Mad Men was a different time, where drinking at work was one of the reasons people actually wanted to go to work. Where instead of free coffee, the office sprung for free booze! Don sipping on a cut crystal glass of fine spirits exemplifies the utmost in drunk sophistication. Plus, I’ve still not been able to get through an episode of Mad Men without mixing up an Old Fashioned cocktail. Also, be sure to check out the Mad Men drinking game, but add on our special HomeWetBar.com bonus rule, where you drink twice every time Don pours a fresh dram.

Karen Walker from Will & Grace

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© Warner Bros TV

TV has seen many changes through the years, and 90s TV sitcoms absolutely deserve their own category. Karen Walker was the first TV drunk of her kind, unapologetic in her consumption of alcohol, with the bank account and personal designated driver to pull it off. With classic one-liners like, “Honey, I’d suck the alcohol out of a deodorant stick,” and “As long as I’m drunk, what’s the difference?” Dressed in impeccable clothes from top to bottom, with her signature up-do and mini bar for a purse, Karen brought proud public drunkenness into the national spotlight. Whether seated at a four star restaurant, or lying flat on a cold kitchen floor, Karen Walker always reached for the top shelf.

Edina and Patsy from AbFab

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© BBC

Classic pairings include peanut butter & jelly, Samson & Delilah, and, of course, Edina and Patsy. The gin-soaked best friends from Absolutely Fabulous are two of the most recognizable characters from British TV shows. Though the series began more than 20 years ago, these two have been drinking it up ever since, and still look fabulous. Whether scrambling to adopt the latest fad, searching for the ever elusive fountain of youth, or enjoying a little bubbly with breakfast, Edina and Patsy are supremely loveable drunks. With rumors swirling that an Absolutely Fabulous movie is in the works, you can be sure that these two lovable lushes will be swigging their way through retirement, too. Not that they did that much work in the first place.

Fun Bobby from Friends

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© Warner Bros TV

90s TV sitcoms were definitely a sweet spot for drunk TV characters. A brief, but unforgettable example was “Fun Bobby,” from Friends. Fun Bobby, played by Vincent Ventresca, was a guy that Monica dated, who was loads of fun when drinking, but mind-numbingly boring when sober, bestowed by Chandler with the new nickname, “Ridiculously Dull Bobby.” Although not everyone can be the life of the party all the time, we maintain hope that somehow, somewhere, Fun Bobby was able to reclaim his prior glory.

Spuds Mackenzie

spuds-mackenzie

© Anheuser-Busch

Few drunk stories match the fun and whimsy of household pets consuming alcohol. The college freshmen with a dog that loves Schlitz. Aunt Shirley’s cat who sips pinot grigio right from the glass. But the granddaddy of all drunken TV pets is Spuds Mackenzie. Introduced in the 80s as a mascot for Bud Light, Spuds was always close to the beach, surrounded by girls, and epitomized value-priced beer coolness. Spuds as actually played by a female dog named Honey Tree Evil Eye, but hey, this is TV, and commercial advertising at that. You didn’t really think that a male dog named Spuds was getting drunk on Bud Light and then going on camera. This isn’t I Love Lucy.

Robert Kirkman: The man behind The Walking Dead

 

Robert Kirkman

Robert Kirkman

Despite his young age of 35, Robert Kirkman has made a huge name for himself in both literature and TV. If you don’t know his name, you’ll have certainly heard of his most successful series to date: The Walking Dead.

Starting as a comic book series, The Walking Dead was commissioned by AMC and became one of this century’s most successful shows internationally to date. With unforgettable characters such as Daryl, Rick and Shane, we’re taking a look at the man who created this masculine, entertaining and utterly gripping story.

Kirkman: The creator

Robert Kirkman

Born and raised in Kentucky, Kirkman’s southern upbringing certainly translates into the characters and world he created in The Walking Dead. However, his earlier career was far removed from the southern state and instead focused on everyone’s favorite comic book characters – superheroes!

Self-published series Battle Pope was a co-created with Tony Moore, and enjoyed a comic tone as a parody of the typical superhero story. Despite this ironic twist, Kirkman was hired by Image Comics to work on his first mainstream work: Super Patriot.

His career with Image Comics developed and became increasingly successful as he continued. While he created a six-issue series in 2002 called Tech Jacket, he also worked on the hugely successful Invincible, a story following the son of a superhero who goes on to have his own career.

This tongue-in-cheek and truly unique approach to an incredibly popular genre of comic made Invincible the first of Kirkman’s hugely successful ventures, and truly made him a name to watch in the comic book and graphic novel scene. The comic was such a success the, in 2005, Paramount Pictures acquired the rights to the story and hired Kirkman to write the script!

Kirkman also enjoyed a long-running freelance contract with Marvel Comics, working on characters such as Ant-Man and the X-Men amongst other, lesser known works. While this freelance deal was put on halt when Kirkman became a partner at Image Comics, it served to make him one of the most recognizable names in the industry, and a superstar of the graphic novel and comic scene.

Kirkman: The writer

David Morrissey

David Morrissey

His artistry and writing obviously interlink within the comics he has created, but his writing talents expand further than the graphic novel route. Once The Walking Dead rights had been acquired by AMC in 2009, he not only came on board as an executive producer, but has written a large number of the episodes of the series.

Along with writing for the TV show, Kirkman has written three traditional novels documenting one of the most famous villains from the series, The Governor. Looking at the events that turned him into the evil dictator we love to hate today, the novels expand upon the series and show that Kirkman truly is one of the most talented creators of his generation.

The Walking Dead

 

Gage Skidmore

Gage Skidmore

Of course, Kirkman’s most well received work has been The Walking Dead; blending the recognition of the deep south of America with the traditional zombie trope, Kirkman has created a publication that is amongst the most successful franchises we’ve seen this millennium.

It is the depth of the characters that makes us love this series so much; while past franchises focused upon the horror of the living dead, we instead are given an insight into the humanity behind a zombie apocalypse.

Created in 2003, The Walking Dead was an almost instant success, with the monthly publication receiving multiple awards during its 11 years of publication. In 2010, when the TV show first launched, the comic series also won the Eisner Award for the Best Continuing Series at Comic-Con, cementing Kirkman’s work as a classic forever.

An Ode to Television Manly-Men…Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad

Bad guys on television and in movies are almost always the most compelling characters. The all-time classic bad guys have a way of justifying their actions to themselves with noble causes (i.e. – taking care of family), but they are ultimately truly driven by one thing – power. Hailed by critics and viewers alike as one of the best tv dramas of all-time, AMC’s Breaking Bad has one such “bad guy,” Walter White, played by Bryan Cranston.

Walter’s story, up to a certain point, could be that of anyone’s – he is a high school Chemistry teacher working two jobs to support his family. When faced with his imminent mortality, Walt makes an extreme decision (supposedly) to secure the financial well-being of his family after his death by manufacturing and selling crystal meth before he dies. For viewers, this drastic switch from law-abiding everyman to illicit-drug-producing criminal could come across as far-fetched. However, Walter White is played by actor-extraordinaire, Bryan Cranston, whose gritty, tough, and heart-wrenching performance on the show has hooked viewers for five seasons and made this Dr. Jeckyl-into-Mr. Hyde transformation completely believable. As we head into the fifth and final season of Breaking Bad, we at HomeWetBar want to pay tribute to manly-man actor, Bryan Cranston, by profiling the career highlights and notable quotes of this intense dramatic actor who has had us all clamoring after “the blue stuff” for over five years.

Career Highlights

Before hitting it big with Breaking Bad, Cranston played a number of smaller dramatic roles on television shows, including CHiPs, Airwolf, Hill Street Blues, Falcon Crest, Baywatch, Jake and the Fatman, Matlock, L. A. Law, Walker, Texas Ranger, and Murder, She Wrote.*

One of his most memorable recurring roles was as Dr. Tim Whatley on the television comedy Seinfeld. Dr. Tim Whatley’s character famously had dirty magazines in the waiting area of his dental practice and dubbed Jerry an “anti-dentite” after hearing Jerry tell a dentist joke.

Cranston’s longest role came as Hal, the loveable and goofy father in the sitcom Malcolm in the Middle. Actor and comedian W. C. Fields once said, “Never work with children or animals.” What Fields meant by this was that children and animals will only upstage a grown-up actor or will create a blooper by doing something unscripted. Cranston’s ability as a comedic actor, however, overrode that sage advice, as he not only worked with one child actor, but a grand total of five (or six if you count the baby in later seasons)! His ability to switch from bumbling dad to serious father and sometimes to fun-loving mischief maker in the role of Hal helped show that Cranston had some amazing acting chops!

Notable Quotes from Bryan Cranston

What’s great about well-written material is, if you can shock with justifiable actions, that’s the best.**

You know, this business is pure luck. It truly is. There is a tangible amount of luck that is necessary for a successful career, and the only way that luck happens is if you’re prepared for it and you stick with it. If you drop out of the scene, your opportunity for luck diminishes greatly. No one’s going to say, “Hey, you’re an insurance salesman. Come and do this movie.”*

I think the best written films or television series have a measure of the opposite of what they are. We have some darkly comic moments sprinkled throughout “Breaking Bad,” as we hasd some sweet sentiment or serious drama sprinkled throughout “Malcolm in the Middle.” I think any good movie does that, any good play. You have to break it up. You can’t have one train going in one direction all the time. Audiences are more sophisticated than that.*

A lot of people think, “This guy does that really well. Here is a role just like that for him.” When I left “Malcolm in the Middle,” I got two offers to do television pilots and they featured fun, goofy dads. I said no, and one of the producers said, “Why would you say no? You’re perfect for it and it’s exactly what you do.” I said, “It’s exactly what I did for seven years, but I am not going to help anyone put me in a pigeonhole.” So I won’t be looking at scripts about a teacher who becomes a drug dealer for a while.*

Walter White’s Most Memorable Quotes***

We are going to make a good product that does what it is supposed to, as advertised. No emulsifiers, no baking powder, no bleach, no chili powder. Season 1, Episode 1 – “Pilot”

I’m sorry, what were you asking me? Oh, yes, that stupid plastic container I asked you to buy. You see, hydrofluoric acid won’t eat through plastic; it will however dissolve metal, rock, glass, ceramic. So there’s that. – Season 1, Episode 2 – “Cat’s in the Bag…”

It’s kind of funny. When I got my diagnosis – cancer – I said to myself, ‘Why me?’ And then, the other day, when I got the good news, I said the same thing. – Season 2, Episode 10 – “Over”

Name one thing in this world that is not negotiable. – Season 3, Episode 6 – “Sunset”

The universe is random. It’s not inevitable. It’s simple chaos. It’s subatomic particles in endless, aimless collision. That’s what science teaches us, but what is this saying? What is it telling us, when on the very night that this man’s daughter dies, it’s me who’s having a drink with him? How can that be random? – Season 3, Episode 10 – “Fly”

Why am I the only person capable of behaving in a professional manner? – Season 4, Episode 4 – “Bullet Point”

I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger. A guy opens his door and gets shot, and you think that of me? No, I am the one who knocks. – Season 4, Episode 6: “Cornered”

What is going on with me is not about some disease. It’s about choices. Choices I have made. Choices I stand by. – Season 4, Episode 4 – “Cornered”

It’s over. We’re safe…I won. – Season 4, Episode 13 – Face Off


Walter White is complex and dark, which is one of the reasons Breaking Bad has become one of the best TV dramas of all time. Bryan Cranston’s portrayal of the meth-making chemistry teacher is spot on, earning him this ode to TV manly-men! How do you think this final season of Breaking Bad will end? Share your thoughts with us!

*For more information, visit imdb.com
**For more quotes, visit brainyquote.com
***For more Walter White quotes, visit amctv.com/show/breaking-bad