What makes a drink manly? Which drinks require that you turn in your man card if you’re caught dead with it? It’s a highly debated topic that our experts here at HomeWetBar.com decided to get to the bottom of. Interestingly enough there are plenty of factors that go into making manly drinks. The first cardinal rule of all manly drinks is that it can’t be sweet. If you’re thinking of ordering a strawberry daiquiri or pina colada, be prepared to hand over your man card. Fruity flavors and colorful drinks are a big no-no! And absolutely no straws! The best cocktails for men are usually brown or clear. The best manly drinks do not necessarily have to be high in alcoholic content, but the bitter, throat burning, taste are what all real men are after. Another factor is the name; when sitting at your local bar with the regulars you must be conscious of what you order. When yelling out to the bartender keep in mind that the manly drink you order has to have a tough name as well. Although, alcoholic content isn’t the largest factor in most manly drinks, it is still a factor. If your hangover is not movie worthy you may want check the bass if your tone before you order that next round of drinks.
Ranking the Top Manly Drinks
There’s no better way to rank the manliest drinks than to measure them by the massive hangover you will have in the morning from knocking too many of these drinks back. Manly cocktails are accredited by their ability to knock you flat on your ass and how fast that can happen. Another trait of the best manly drinks is what puts hair on your chest, that throat burning sensation only real men can appreciate. Aspirin can become a man’s best friend if you have the gaul to test any of these manly cocktails out. We will rank the manliest drinks of all time from one dose of aspirin to the ultimate four doses to help ease the pain of the well known hangover. To keep it easy, 1 dose is the least manly and 4 doses puts it up with the big dogs as being a potent cocktail for men. Although some drinks may rank lower than others, we can all agree that any fellow bold enough to order any of these top manly drinks will never have to worry about their man card being revoked.
Gin and Juice
Rank: 1 Dose
Snoop Dogg recommended. A cocktail made of gin, grapefruit, and orange juice making this a smooth drink where a man can keep his cool while mingling with the ladies. This drink is also tough enough to be one of the only most manly cocktails with a fruity taste that you won’t have to turn in your man card for.
Whiskey Sour
Rank: 1 Dose
The name alone takes the cake for ranking among the top manly drinks. A concoction of whiskey and lemon and maybe sugar for the beginners. Not the biggest and baddest of drinks for men, but this can be a refreshing for the summer that is sure to add some bass to your tone when you order the next round.
Jagerade
Rank: 1 Dose
Made of gatorade energy drink and jagermeister herbal liqueur this manly drink can help up your electrolyte intake. We’re not too sure about the buzz factor, but the taste can guarantee a peach fuzz for any baby face pansy that can’t handle the strong bite of the Jagerade.
Bloody Bull
Rank: 1 Dose Something like the manly version of the bloody mary. A tasty mixture of vodka, beef bouillon, lemon, tabasco sauce and worcestershire sauce. Again, the name makes up for at least 50% of what makes the manliest drinks manly. WARNING: Make sure you drink it in a regular style drinking glass. Don’t let them serve you in a frilly glass or we’ll revoke your man card! Not the top choice of drinks for taste, but any man that can down this probably has the hairy chest of a bull from the burning bite of the bloody bull.
Sidecar
Rank: 2 Doses
A classic cocktail served in a traditional glass like this. It is made up of triple sec, cognac, and lemon juice -No Sugar. Not the manliest cocktail ever, but it definitely has enough kick to make it tougher than the average martini. In all honesty a martini has never been considered the go-to cocktail for men, but we can agree that James Bond carries that pass for all men, thus making strong cocktails manly even when served in a martini glass.
Gold Rush
Rank: 2 Doses
A man’s summertime friend. A shot made up of bourbon, lemon juice, and honey will put some hair on that bare chest of yours. Still potent, but just enough lemon and honey to make it a smooth shot. This manly drink is something like a hot toddy, but the cooler summer version. Get over that summer cold with a gold rush & make it a double!
Made up of only 2 key ingredients Canadian Whiskey and a dash of lime juice in a shot glass, taken straight up; definitely a man’s drink. A cocktail or shot’s name plays another big role in defining what makes a manly drink manly. You can’t yell just any drink name out to the bartender among the at the local bar. Order a Snakebite and you’ll receive nods of approval from the regulars for that knee buckling bitter taste.
The Godfather
Rank: 3 Doses
Another well known gentleman’s drink that can add bass to your tone. The Godfather has a name that, alone, fits as one of the top manly drinks. A sophisticated blend of bourbon or whiskey and amaretto served in served in classic whiskey glasses make this a classic choice for any real man who can take a real drink. Much like the popular Godfather movie this mixed drink can become a man’s favorite in no time.
Jack and Coke
Rank: 3 Doses
This mixture is the universal manly drink for men. Served in whiskey glasses, the recipe is simple. Combine Jack Daniels and just enough Coke to make it a crisp bittersweet mixed drink for men that is known to put some bass in your voice. Switch things up at the bar and order a Rum and Coke or use a different kind of whiskey. Drink too many of these and a hangover will be knocking on your door bright and early.
Tom Collins
Rank: 3 Doses
It’s safe to say any cocktail that has a man’s name should be deemed a common manly cocktail. The Tom Collins is a perfect example of what a man’s cocktail should taste like, gin, lemon juice, club soda and a hint of sugar on the rocks. It can be served with fruit, but honestly what man wants a fruit filled cocktail? No man can go wrong drinking a manly drink that has the ability to be smooth and tough at the same time.
Whiskey on Water
Rank: 3 Doses
Served in a quaffer glass or shot glass with a chaser, this manly drink is much like a shot with a built in chaser. To do it right you’re going to need a quaffer shot glass with a chaser like this. Simply fill the top with whiskey and the bottom with water or coke. Alternatively fill the glass with an energy and the top with a shot to make a Jager bomb. Although this drink is manly, we’re only giving you 3 stars for it since you’re using a chaser.
Rusty Nail
Rank: 4 Doses
The name alone will send chills down the spine of any coward that can’t handle drinks for real men. Fill your whiskey glass with scotch an orange or lemon peel on the rocks and you’ve got one rusty nail. Order one of the best cocktails for men, like the Rusty Nail, at a hard core pub and drinking vets will respect you. Be easy when taking these shots or you’ll feel quite rusty yourself in the morning!
Dirty Martini
Rank: 3 Doses
A sleek combo of gin, vermouth, olive juice, and yes, the classic olives. The Dirty Martini make the perfect drink for that charming guy standing at the bar that has a bit more class and maturity than any fruit cocktail drinking wimp. “Martini: shaken, not stirred,” like Bond these manly cocktails will sneak up on you before you know it. That familiar throat burning sensation is clearly evident from a mere whiff of your glass.
Old Fashioned
Rank: 4 Doses
Don Draper of Mad Men TV series has made us very familiar with this particular cocktail. Order an Old Fashioned anywhere and you should get nods of approval for ordering such a manly cocktail. A manly concoction of bourbon, bitters, a hint of sugar water and for the sake of your sacred man card no fruit but serve it in a glass like this. You will appear more mature and distinguished than if you ordered a long island iced tea. This can definitely rank as being one of the best cocktails for men and is a classic choice for that dapper guy at the bar. Don’t go overboard with these bad boys or you may need to leave those car keys at home.
Classic Manhattan with Orange Twist
(why an orange? Because men don’t eat cherries.)
Rank: 4 Doses
If Sinatra and the Rack Pack can deem this cocktail as a favorite, then we can go a step further in making this one of the top classic cocktails for men. A mixture of bourbon, vermouth, bitters, & a orange twist or stemmed cherry (if requested) making this a top choice when it comes to drinks for men, serve it in an old fashioned coup glass like this for refined tastes. Remember this is a gentleman’s drink, don’t ruin the experience with a piece of fruit lingering in your glass, opt for the orange twist instead of the cherry to up your man card score. This manly drink ranks 4 doses for a reason. Remember that.
Irish Car Bomb
Rank: 4 Doses
Picture the Jagerbomb. Now picture something much more manly, higher in alcoholic content, something for a real man and you will see the badass of all badass manly drinks-The Irish Car Bomb. A deadly combination of irish cream and irish whiskey put into a shot glass and then dropped into a pint glass of irish stout. Beer advocates can appreciate this kind of drink at it can be deemed as one of the manliest drinks ever created for men. Make sure you drink fast before it curdles!
Sure, there are plenty more classic cocktails for men that can be added to this list of the top manly drinks, but we like to leave some drinks up to the imagination. At the end of the day a manly cocktail is per choice and you can order any kind of fruit filled beverage that you would like at the bar. BUT if you want to mature as a social drinker into an experienced and responsible manly cocktail expert you may want to keep these valid tips in mind when you’re at the bar. First things first, please, no fruit! if there is a need for garnish make it a simple olive or slice of lemon and nothing more. Next, is the taste it either has to be really potent or harsh enough to turn that baby face into a full beard and goatee. And last but definitely not least the best manly drinks have a tough name to match that tough taste. It is safe to say cocktails for men are usually straight up or involve shots. And don’t forget every woman loves a man with a big cock…..tail shaker so our sasquatch cocktail shaker may come in handy the next time you want to try some of these manly cocktails.
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Something like the manly version of the bloody mary. A tasty mixture of vodka, beef bouillon, lemon, tabasco sauce and worcestershire sauce. Again, the name makes up for at least 50% of what makes the manliest drinks manly. WARNING: Make sure you drink it in a regular style drinking glass. Don’t let them serve you in a frilly glass or we’ll revoke your man card! Not the top choice of drinks for taste, but any man that can down this probably has the hairy chest of a bull from the burning bite of the bloody bull.
This mixture is the universal manly drink for men. Served in whiskey glasses, the recipe is simple. Combine Jack Daniels and just enough Coke to make it a crisp bittersweet mixed drink for men that is known to put some bass in your voice. Switch things up at the bar and order a Rum and Coke or use a different kind of whiskey. Drink too many of these and a hangover will be knocking on your door bright and early.
A sleek combo of gin, vermouth, olive juice, and yes, the classic olives. The Dirty Martini make the perfect drink for that charming guy standing at the bar that has a bit more class and maturity than any fruit cocktail drinking wimp. “Martini: shaken, not stirred,” like Bond these manly cocktails will sneak up on you before you know it. That familiar throat burning sensation is clearly evident from a mere whiff of your glass.
Picture the Jagerbomb. Now picture something much more manly, higher in alcoholic content, something for a real man and you will see the badass of all badass manly drinks-The Irish Car Bomb. A deadly combination of irish cream and irish whiskey put into a shot glass and then dropped into a pint glass of irish stout. Beer advocates can appreciate this kind of drink at it can be deemed as one of the manliest drinks ever created for men. Make sure you drink fast before it curdles!
